Do Not Obey This Sign!

Do they fine you
before or after
you touch the wire?
Them 'gators is gettin' upptiy!
If ever there was sign you should not
obey, this is it.

Bavarian brewers recommend: Beer, enjoy it consciously.
Unconsciously isn't half as much fun. Duh!

How to loose weight on the jogging path.
Step 1. Throw up.
Step 2. Chin up.
Step 3. Squat, push up.
Repeat ad naseum.
Hey, I think you lost a kilo already!
Does this mean I should stop and help hitchhikers to escape from the inmates, or does this mean the inmates themselves are the hitchhikers?!

Do not blow your engine here!

Go there and watch the tide come in.

Somewhere between Lower Oddington and Chipping Norton....

Don't throw those old sheriffs away; many can be rehabilitated!

Just because you're guilty doesn't mean you did it either!

The wally's arse?

Hang a right just past Intercourse,
New York.

If I were dyslexic,
I'm sure this would make sense.

For disoriented secret agents?

Dat good ol suthun cookin.

Make sure it's on your cv.

I always wondered how proctologists amuse themselves.

Once you've been there, done, that, see below...

Cleanliness is next
to godliness.

One McDeath, easy on the salmonella sauce, to go.
Hey, I think my kid just fell off the jungle gym.

Thirsty? Pop a Zit!

You inna hurry, mate?

Don't mess with the moose.

Obviously I went to the wrong high school.
We went collecting star fish
on field trips.

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Ones I've heard about but haven't actually seen [pdf format].

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